Deciding whether you are going to be a stay at home mum or a mum that forges onwards and upwards with her career for some women it is a no brainer, but for other mums it is not that clear-cut.
There are many things to consider on the working mum stay at home mum front, some of which are glaringly obvious and some less so.
Working Mums Versus Stay At Home Mums
Do you like your job? Perhaps it something you have trained years for and it gives you a certain status, or maybe you work just for financial reasons.
If you lost your job tomorrow how would you feel? Would you feel you have downgraded yourself and have lost your identity, or would you be filled with a sense of relief?
If you did leave your job how would your partner feel about supporting you? Is your relationship in the right place for you to be supported, and would your partner be comfortable taking on that role.
Could you work part-time, flexi-time or do a job share? Would the part-time hours give you the flexibility you need. Some mums I have come across have found themselves doing their full-time job part-time and having to make up the time with unpaid overtime or spending their evenings working from home. You may also miss out on much deserved promotions from work as a part-timer.
Many working mums say it is harder work staying at home than going out to work. Having the children twenty-four hours a day can be relentless and lonely if you have not got friends around during the day. Money maybe short, holidays sparse and you also won’t have the opportunity to dress up everyday for work.
There will also not be the same opportunity for “me” time. Popping out for a wander round the shops at lunch time or chilling on the train into work is a luxury that will disappear.
Often the biggest challenge with whether you should be a working mum or a stay at home mum are the finances. So if you are torn as to whether to keep working or not then take a long hard look at how much it is going to cost you to go out to work. How much will the childcare be a month, commuting costs, your working wardrobe and other working related costs.
One of my clients worked out that she would be earning next to nothing when she had deducted all her costs and that helped her reach a decision as to what path she should take.
The thing is everyone in this situation is different. Different jobs, different financial circumstances and different relationships. Doing what is right for you is what is important. So whether you decide to be a working mum or a stay at home mum – you are a contented mum. Well at least most of the time.